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What's on My Mind

Scanning through the enormous pile of clutter in my head, I found this stuff that may amuse you. I add the newest stuff to the top. It's kind of my own one-man blog thingy.


And the little thumbs are pressing the buttons to spell out "U R A Q T". Do it while U R driving and C what U can smash in 2. WTF mate.
If you are a typist and try to do too much of this on a full-size keyboard, your brain will explode. OMG!

Seriously, on the subject of overused words, seriously is seriously overused. Seriously!

Everybody better bone up on the definition of Socialism. It's coming soon if we let it. Wake up!

The summer of 2009 closed out with more cool weather. We must certainly all agree that Al Gore is a total loon promoting his "global warming" crap. What's worse, he's laughing all the way to the bank.

The blogs are a great example of how poorly educated people are. Poor sentence structure and spelling errors abound. If you can't Touch Type, learn it now. Another place where the schools are failing is not REQUIRING Touch Typing of every student. Where can you go today without typing skills?

One of the best ways to measure the success of your life is to count the number of people who come to your funeral. Of course, you can't count if you're dead. Anyway, these are the people who are really sincere about their friendship with you. I think about my brother Jan, his funeral, and the number of lives he touched. Now, he was successful and he didn't have two dimes to rub together.

Consider those advertising guys who talk about a business as a "Best Kept Secret". Aren't they actually referring to previously failed advertising campaigns. So much for the secret.

I heard a reference on the radio about an "Authentic Reproduction". Think about that one.

A mortgage company is advertising a mortgage for persons "who have a credit history that only proves they are human." Certainly a long phrase just to state "bad credit".

We Americans measure everything in "football fields". An aircraft carrier is so many football fields long. Something or other covers four football fields. Why don't we have a small unit of length called a "football"?

How come the bad guys on TV and in the movies are such lousy shots?  Machine guns are blazing and they never hit a damn thing. And the good guys? One shot from a six-shooter and the bad guy one football field away (see above) falls dead.

What is the deal with the ads from financial institutions that will "loan" you money. "Loan" is a noun; not a verb. Those morons. How about "lend you money".

Come on now! Ever notice how many people out there don't know the difference between your and you're?  Or to and too?  And what about the proper use of fewer instead of less? Didn't we all learn all of this back in the fifth grade?

Is it really a good idea to just change all the rules of English grammar and punctuation to meet our needs rather than insisting that the children learn the rules as we did? It's called discipline.

If you took Journalism in college and did poorly, go work for a newspaper. They need more crappy writers. How come every sentence in a newspaper is a paragraph?

Can you just imagine Hillary Clinton or Nancy Pelosi as president? Oh, boy! Now we CAN imagine Barack Obama as president. We'll see what he does TO us and our way of life.

Okay, guys! How many Semi-Annual sales does Victoria Secret have each year? Yeah, I know, not enough. Seriously, don't they have a commercial on TV about every two months?

Guess what?  Art Van is having the biggest sale this weekend. Don't miss it! I'll bet it'll be back next weekend.

And how about that "Inventory Clearance Sale"? Sounds desperately serious. You know,  the purpose of every sale is to clear inventory. Duh!

Sonny Elliot said that the weather one day was as boring as listening to a man fishing on the radio. He also mentioned a nudist with a one-button suit. I love this guy.

Have you noticed that whenever you go to a pot-luck dinner, everybody brings a dish to pass that contains enough food so that everybody can take a single serving. Say there are 50 people at the dinner, then each attendee must take 50 servings each to get rid of all the food. Well, of course they don't, so there are a lot of leftovers. Yes, it would be impolite to bring a smaller dish.

The scene is on a TV cop-type show and the police detectives, federal agents, crime scene investigators or whoever are searching a dark room with flashlights.  Why the hell don't they just turn on the room lights? Also, how many offices do you see in TV shows that are really dark? I know, it's for dramatic effect.

Did you know that the Swiss Army Knife has been around since 1891. And, yes, the Swiss does have an army.  For defense only.

Do marketing people think that we are so stupid that we can't see that $999.99 for a lawn tractor is really $1,000.00? Actually $1,060.00 with the sales tax. Oh, excuse me, $1,059.99. Nah! It's only $900.00! Truly stupid marketing for the stupid masses.

What is the deal with that old font used in movie ads? You know, those tall skinny letters all jammed together; the ones you can't read! It's in the newspaper ads and they put it on the video tape and DVD covers. More really stupid marketing.


Who do you really trust?  Completely?  Why?
Why do people brag about how much money they make? Do they also brag about all the sins they committed?
Why are children so much wiser than their parents? Alright, there're not. They just think they are.
When and how do you tell your parents "Thank You" for your upbringing?
What could be worse than having one of your children die before you?
A lot of times, I talk to myself (because I'm the only one who listens). Most of the time I talk to Jesus. He was a fascinating individual. I'd like to meet him someday. I think he has something to do with my woodworking skills.

It is somewhat of a curse being a perfectionist as I am. It's taking me forever to finish some of the projects I've got started. But, the satisfaction is great.